The Not-So-Perfect Meringue

Have you ever had one of those moments when you are completely inspired to be a 50’s housewife or a millennial man?

Your fingers itch to clean the whole house top to bottom. That stupid, plastic tub that you have failed to bleach clean would finally succumb to your scrubbing power. The closet after this day will never be a safety hazard again, because not only would it meticulously organized but decluttered.

Well if you haven’t, then you must not have looked on pinterest or read Little White Horse, because that is what inspired me to really tackle my home. Matt and I clean our home at least once a week, but I wanted to get every nook dusted and cleaned. Last week, I put bookplates in all of our books, and I realized just how dusty some places in our apartment was getting.

So we did it. By the end of Saturday afternoon, our home looked great. I was feeling pretty smug. Clean, organized house, AND dinner was done. Who rocked? We did.

God must have felt like I needed to be humbled. I figured since I basically just got an A+ on being a housewife, I would try to make a chocolate meringue pie. I had drooled at the picture a few weeks ago, and I had never made a meringue before.

Recipe here

Doesn’t it look beautiful? I was so excited as I watched my egg whites and sugar whip up beautifully. When I dumped the chocolate in my fingers couldn’t help but to nick a taste. I was completely daydreaming about my awesome meringue that I would be eating in not too long. I cut the wax paper and put the batter onto the baking pan where I carefully swirled it into a circle. I quickly double checked the recipe before popping into the oven and setting the timer. After that I called my sister while my meringue baked.

30 min later, Matt was yelling at me to get off the phone. Apparently, something was burning in our oven. (Turns out it was the Western Family wax paper.) I jumped onto the couch to hit the smoke alarm off every few seconds (still talking to my sister) while Matt heroically tried to fix what was burning. Matt swore that the meringues were done, but me having a perfect 50’s housewife moment would not listen to him. I knew without a doubt that the recipe said it had to be in there for an hour and 20 min.

Because the front door and every window was open, I caved and took out my meringues after 40 min. They were not beautiful at all…Matt said that we could go outside and play frisbee with them if I wanted to. It was a complete and total fail. I was so upset and furious. Why didn’t my recipe work and why did the wax paper catch fire??   I read the directions and all the comments and no one had complained about the cook time.

My dismal finished product....and this picture doesn't even show the completely black burned bottom

I felt a bit better after watch an hour of “Vogue” on hulu, but still I felt like I was wearing the “cone of shame” from Up.

So to prove to my mother and myself that I’m not a totally failure at a part-time housewife here are some projects that didn’t turn out so bad. (Notice they are not food)

Reusable Ziplock bags (Matt made the small one!)

Awesome Apron

Grocery bag that doesn't rip when walking home

RS thingy -- It's a "Forget-me-not" reminder of Pre. Uchtdorf

Menu on cabinet

Matt says I'm over doing it, but really ego shattered.

Morals of my day

1. Recipes lie sometimes

2. God will humble you if you think you are perfect

3. You can't be perfect.

4. There is always something else to clean.

PS. Does anyone really know how to make a meringue??? I would really really really love tips. As you can tell I need them.