Princeton is a pretty intimidating place when you're a stay-at-home mom.
There are people all around me my age that are so accomplished.
They are getting a Phd.
They've traveled the world.
Many of them speak at least one other language.
Many of them dress fashionably and just look so put together.
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| What I'm imagining in my head |
And I can't help thinking that maybe that could have been me.
Matt and I started seriously talking about what I wanted to do with my life January 2012.
He basically looked at me and said I could do whatever I felt like that was legal
and just to let him know what I decided on.
Graduate school, work, cooking school, and having an offspring were just a few of my options.
Obviously I eventually picked the kid.
Sometimes I second guess if I made the right choice.
When we go out with any group of people, I rarely get asked how I'm doing or how my day was.
They rather listen to Matt give a simplified version of whatever he's doing in Chemistry and pretend to understand what he is talking about,
than listen to me talk about being at home with Tiny all day.
It hurts, and it is irritating.
They make it seem like my life doesn't matter.
Some of them even avoid eye contact with me, so that they don't have to talk to me.
Like I get it to a point, they aren't at all in the mindset of having kids yet.
But still...sometimes it seems that my relationship with my baby is less interesting than carbon's relationship to hydrogen.
Like I get it to a point, they aren't at all in the mindset of having kids yet.
But still...sometimes it seems that my relationship with my baby is less interesting than carbon's relationship to hydrogen.
The truth is my life isn't boring.
I'm constantly reading some book, trying some new project, or going to some new (local) place.
But even when I'm not doing those things,
my life at home is beautiful.
It's full of smiles and laughter.
Lots of kisses, crying, and messes.
Lots of kisses, crying, and messes.
In honor of being a mother for a year,
I decided to take photos of what Madeleine and I do all day.
I don't want to forget why I made my choice.
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| :) |
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| Music |
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| Dancing to Abba |
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| Dancing in the kitchen |
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| Being Dinosaurs |
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| Hugs |
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| Reading |
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Lunch |
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| Singing Tiny Dancer |
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| She brought me this book to read to her |
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| Tea Time (not really...more like pinterest time) |
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| Painting |
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| Yoga |
I stayed at home because my baby is only a baby once. I stayed at home for these small moments. I love getting to know her and her tiny quirks. I love how she pats on the door when she wakes up and thinks bath time is the best thing ever. It's teaching me very unique lessons, that I'm pretty sure I wouldn't learn if I was working. Maybe one day I'll have a job and people might actually act interested in my life, but right now I have a little person that is interested in everything I do...and for now...that's enough. More education or working can wait. Right now, I'm happy just being a mom.
I love this- I feel the EXACT same way. I wonder if my parents are disappointed I'm not a fancy something or other, or if it means I "took the easy way out"- but then I realize how important having a wonderful parent is and the fact that the world needs more people fully invested in their children not less! I often pose the thought to myself of ok all these wonderful things I dream of... being a mother was the biggest one, how awesome that I accomplished my number one dream in life first! Woo look at me prioritizing. You are a beautiful writer and I enjoy reading your blog!
ReplyDeleteThat's exactly how I feel. I didn't know what I wanted to do after school but I did want to be a mom...so I did. haha. It was my big goal, and I still have plenty of time to finish all my other goals.
DeleteOh my gosh I love this post so much! This was really something I needed to hear and I think a lot of people need to hear. You are incredible Michelle!
ReplyDeleteThanks! I had been thinking about this for a while and finally just wrote it. :D
DeleteHi Michelle, I am your Grandma's cousin. If she were here to talk with you, I know she would give you a big hug and thank you for taking such good care of her GREAT granddaughter.....NO nanny, babysitter, or day care will love her and enjoy this unbelievable time of growth. THANK you for doing the right thing. Sharing in God's work is the most important work on earth.....take pride in just being MOM....a great calling and honor. Love to you, Shirley
ReplyDeleteThanks! I know she's happy with me. She told me to "forget" to take my birth control and just have a kid. She told me I'd be a lot happier as a mom than a student. She was right. haha
DeleteFrom Mollie -
DeleteHey Mimi,
You seem to be in a really contemplative mood, if I read these blog letters right. Know that I love you to pieces, to the moo-moon and back, and more than the fishies in the sea.
Your decision to be a mom is beautiful. I think often people aren’t sure what to say because they don’t understand the beautiful and divine calling of a mother or they have not experienced it. Mimi there are very few strong families in the world. Our family is special.
I know about 4 families here in the mission that are complete and without serious tension or marital problems. I met a child on the street the other day both of his parents work all day and he lives on his bicycle coming home only for lunch with his 22 year old brother.
There exists no stronger bond, no stronger love, no stronger protection or security, or power in the world than the bond between a good mother and her children. In general conference someone said “a mother can exert an influence unequaled by any other person in any other relationship”. This is true.
I liked reading about your struggles with matt. Ive always wondered how that went the first year isn’t suppose to be easy and I never heard of a bad word or struggle. I was hoping everything went well.
Lots of love and hugs from Madeleine's Aunt Mollie
Your sis
ADORABLE post. It looks like you have so much fun at home with your little girl. You are a very insightful and thoughtful person so I know you are passing all those great traits on to her :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful post. I applaud your honesty, and your choice to be a mom. What a wonderful life and memories you two are creating together!
ReplyDelete